I'm Just a Healthcare Bill

 

When life gets hectic, the blog withers from lack of care and TLC.  I’ve killed off a fair number of plants this way and even a sick bird I forgot I was taking care of in the garage (kidding).  Part of the problem is that I occasionally throw too much into a post so I am changing my tune - it’s now ‘ok’ to just pass along a thought.  Basically, I am changing my approach a bit and no longer attempting to write the Sistine Posting each time. 

 

Anyway, it occurred to me that despite my legal education and encyclopedic knowledge of Schoolhouse Rock, the path that Obama-care took to become law is nothing less than baffling.  I refer back to the gospel that is the original ‘I’m Just a Bill Sitting Here on Capital Hill’…hum with me:

 

Boy: Woof! You sure gotta climb a lot of steps to get to this Capitol Building here in Washington. But I wonder who that sad little scrap of paper is?

 

I'm just a bill.


Yes, I'm only a bill.


And I'm sitting here on Capitol Hill.


Well, it's a long, long journey


To the capital city.


It's a long, long wait


While I'm sitting in committee,


But I know I'll be a law someday


At least I hope and pray that I will,


But today I am still just a bill.

 

Boy: Gee, Bill, you certainly have a lot of patience and courage.

 

Bill: Well I got this far. When I started, I wasn't even a bill, I was just an idea. Some folks back home decided they wanted a law passed, so they called their local Congressman and he said, "You're right, there oughta be a law." Then he sat down and wrote me out and introduced me to Congress. And I became a bill, and I'll remain a bill until they decide to make me a law.

 

I'm just a bill.


Yes I'm only a bill,


And I got as far as Capitol Hill.


Well, now I'm stuck in committee


And I'll sit here and wait 


While a few key Congressmen discuss and debate


Whether they should let me be a law.


How I hope and pray that they will,


But today I am still just a bill.

 

Boy: Listen to those congressmen arguing! Is all that discussion and debate about you?

 

Bill: Yeah, I'm one of the lucky ones. Most bills never even get this far. I hope they decide to report on me favorably, otherwise I may die.

 

Boy: Die?

 

Bill: Yeah, die in committee. Oooh, but it looks like I'm gonna live! Now I go to the House of Representatives, and they vote on me.

 

Boy: If they vote yes, what happens?

 

Bill: Then I go to the Senate and the whole thing starts all over again.

 

Boy: Oh no!

 

Bill: Oh yes!

 

I'm just a bill.


Yes, I'm only a bill


And if they vote for me on Capitol Hill


Well, then I'm off to the White House


Where I'll wait in a line


With a lot of other bills


For the president to sign


And if he signs me, then I'll be a law.


How I hope and pray that he will,


But today I am still just a bill.

 

Boy: You mean even if the whole Congress says you should be a law, the president can still say no?

 

Bill: Yes, that's called a veto. If the President vetoes me, I have to go back to Congress and they vote on me again, and by that time you're so old.

 

Boy: By that time it's very unlikely that you'll become a law. It's not easy to become a law, is it?

 

Bill: No!

 

But how I hope and I pray that I will,


But today I am still just a bill.

 

Congressman: He signed you, Bill! Now you're a law!

 

Bill: Oh yes!!!

****

 

In reviewing this cornerstone of constitutional interpretation what occurs to me is that the following stanza must not have made it into the final cut:

 

I'm just a bill.


Yes, I'm only a bill,


And if they don’t vote for me on Capitol Hill,


Well, then I'm off to committee


Where I'll be broken in two,

One piece of me to be approved

While the other slides through,

For the president to sign,

Under procedural snaffoo,


And if he signs me then I'll be a law,

That is, until the repeal…

 

Republican:  OH NO!

Democrat: OH YES!

 

This is not a political statement…call it a procedural satire.  

Comments

[Chris]

Ha! Now I'm going to have that song in my head for days. [Actually, we have the Schoolhouse Rock DVD and CD. My 12YO son plays the CD for his bird while he's at school, so the brainworm already exists :)]

The blog. I struggle with the blog as simple stress reliever/creative outlet OR the blog as Chris' Epistle. I so hear you. Just go with whatever mood you're in. It's your blog, and it's a good one!