History Re-Tweets Itself

I promise this is my last Twitter related post. Unfortunately, it occurred to me how cool it might be to imagine that Twitter existed throughout history. What might have been on the minds of certain historical icons late at night or during their moments of weakness?

I’ve gathered a few potential examples; feel free to comment below with your own if it hits you.

Historical Tweets

“We just adopted a girl – such a cutie!” Woody Allen

“All is well in Section C, taking a quick snoozski..” Chernobyl Tech #4

“Hey tweeples, not sure who said baking soda would take this stain out but, it’s not working.” – M. Lewinsky

“I already said on the TV, I did not have an inappropriate relationship with that woman. I am now going to unfollow all of you…unless you are a woman.” Pres B. Clinton

“Fck it, I am running for President.” H. Clinton

“All my hats are fitting tightly since taking these new vitamins.” B. Bonds

“Just got the kite up in this here storm, trying it without key at end of string first then going to !@!@$!@$ -----….' B. Franklin

“Mission accomplished bitches.” Pres G. Bush

“..wish mom would put some freaking clothes on and stop fawning over Abel..” - Cain

“Heading towards Asia minor if any you twerps are in the area and want to get a cold one.” G. Khan

“Son of a !@#$!@$I#!$” – B. Favre (not last weekend, 1998)

“Yo mili-tweeps, weather is awesome, smell campfires, can’t wait to reason with locals..” – Gen. G.A. Custer

“Like I have ALWAYS said, the key is low interest rates and a super strong housing market..” A. Greenspan

“Wife won’t stop naggin me that everyone’s ready for chow but we gotta make it over this pass before morn…” – George Donner, 1847

“Yo cina-tweeps partying with Nicholson this weekend, gonna be crazy, then heading to Europe for a few days..” R. Polanski

“ERRRRR…AHHHHH” - Frankenstein

“Another sweeeeet hand, could I BE any more lucky!..” – Wild Bill Hickok

“That’s !@$!@ing IT, just filed a 100mm class action against Acme..” W. E. Coyote, Genius

“It can’t be the rats making us sick, it’s gotta be the cats, let’s kill all of them first…” London Civilian, 1348 AD

“Just found out my mother didn’t breast feed me..wtf.” – Charlie Manson, Age 11

“What it IS twollowers – should I make it 2011 or 2012??” - God

Editor's Note. Apologies for the silliness, a break was needed from the nostalgia, two dollar words, loose literary references and passing semi-deep thoughts of the past few posts. Cheers.